Wednesday, April 29, 2009

RePetism and a Book

If you've ever heard someone or yourself say, "I wish these kids came with a manual", then I have found it. It's called Kids Are Worth It: Giving Your Child the Gift of Inner Discipline.

The majority of the book is just that and reminds us that children are human beings, not objects or possessions. Then she throws in a few chapters on this and that using that same philosophy on subjects like money, mealtimes, toilet training, sexuality, etc. I love this woman because she speaks my language. Buy it for someone you know - either new to parenting or struggling with parenthood. Sometimes a new outlook changes everything. Kids are people too.


RePete and I were sitting quietly at Pete's tutoring session, he on my lap in the wingback chair, his head resting against my left breast. He sat up suddenly and said he loved me and that I was comfy. Then he asked if I would buys him girls for presents. I'm pretty sure he meant actual girls, not boobs, but it was funny all the same.

And last night we went to watch my nephew, Tbone play soccer and afterward we walked (my sister's suggestion) over to a forbidden (in our house) fast food joint (McD's) for ice cream. It was approaching 8:30 pm and it was getting dark and RePete got all excited and said,"Oh my gosh, we get to walk in the dark and cross the big road and eat ice cream at McDonald's!" Do you think I shelter my boys? *gasp*


Thursday, April 23, 2009

Egg Blowing


Did you ever blow eggs for Easter? My mom used to do this with us girls all the time. They are so fragile that making it a yearly tradition is a must. I tried it with my boys this year for the first time and they loved it. I loved that they used all their hot air to clear out the eggs. It gives me a headache.

I found some pretty rub on stickers at Michaels and they came with rhinestones. If you know Pete, then you'll understand why his egg in the middle resembles a disco ball. That kid loves shiny stuff.

From one of our Dogwood trees, we cut a few branches with tiny buds for our vase and with a little water, the beautiful flowers bloomed and added to our arrangement.


Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Sex Education, Part II

...or, kill me now, please.

We spent Easter Sunday with my in-laws and they had that movie, Marley and Me. MIL assured me that it was all about this dog and nothing bad was in it, so Pete could watch it. A little bit into it, (close your eyes if you haven't seen it), Anniston has a miscarriage and they talk about "trying again".

Trying again. Two very simple words that a year ago would have flown over Pete's head and he never would have blinked an eye. Sunday, he blinked and looked at me.

Pete: What do they mean try again?

Me: Try again to have a baby. Now, shhh. Watch the movie.

Pete: What does try again mean?

Me: (shit,not again) Pete. It means they'll try to have another baby. That's all.

Pete: Mom. What are they trying? How do they try?

Me: Again Pete, we'll have this discussion when you get a little older. Oh wait, I think I hear Grandma calling me.

So now this is building up. I don't want it to build up. I don't want it to become so taboo, that it becomes so taboo.

However, I don't want to have this conversation yet. Pete thinks things too hard, sometimes to the point of obsession. This is just the kind of thing he'll obsess over. And the act of sticking his penis into a vagina is NOT something I want him thinking too much about - not at nine. I don't want him thinking about me and BN either, which he will.

I never thought about this moment before. Maybe I figured he'd hear about it from the neighbor kid or something and he wouldn't ask. Although, realistically, I don't want the neighbor kid teaching him that. I would prefer he learn it from us, but I never thought about the yuck factor in that.

This morning at breakfast, Pete asked me if I would just tell him how babies were made and I deferred to my earlier comments. I also said I'd ask Dad to talk to him about it later as I had to do something right at that moment. He said he didn't want Dad telling him because he made it too complicated. That cracked me up. BN does tend to over explain everything. In fact, I used to cringe when he answered Pete's questions because he gave too much information. Luckily, it went over his head.


I'm going online to find a benign explanation. Or maybe there is a book. You know, I don't think I ever got "the talk". Maybe that is why I am having trouble with this; I'm sure I learned it from a cousin or friend. Of course, I wouldn't have obsessed over it, so it was no biggie.

??? Now I'm obsessing over it, aren't I? Making too big a deal? How did you explain it to your young ones?


Monday, April 13, 2009

Sex Education, Part I

...or lack of.

Pete is nine and things that used to go over his head are no longer.

The other day in the car went something like this:

Pete: Mom, why do my testicles hang down?

Me: That's just how you are made.

Pete: But why? Why can't they be inside?

Me: Well, they just are. (thinking) Your body is too hot. They need to be at a cooler temperature. (crap)

Pete: Why?

Me: (how do I get around this? is there any other way?) Well, there's a fluid inside that needs the cooler temperature. If it gets too hot, it'll die. (crappola)

Pete: I'm gonna die!!!

Me: NO! The fluid will die.

Pete: Whydoesthefluiddie?AndwhydoIneedit?Whatisitfor?

Me: (biiiiig breath) Well, Pete, the fluid contains sperm. Sperm is needed to make babies and if it dies, you can't make babies. (work with me here, people, I'm trying to simplify and tell as little as possible, but it isn't working)

Pete: What do you mean? Moms make the babies.

Me: Well, (I couldn't stop using that opener) babies actually require a Dad and a Mom. The sperm from the Dad and the egg from the Mom make the baby.

Pete: You have eggs! (think chicken) Can I see them?

Me: (I go on to explain how tiny they are and that he can't see them)

Pete chews on this information for a bit, then asks the biggie.

Pete: How do Dads and Moms make babies.

Me: Pete, I'm tired right now and I answered your original question. I think the rest should be answered when you are a bit older.

Pete: Mooooom, I'm niiiine!!!!

Me: Right. Ask me again when you are a teenager.

**I thought I was done. I'll share Part II tomorrow.**