Friday, February 15, 2008

The Birds and The Bees

A friend of ours is having another baby. This will be baby #5. I was telling BN their happy news over dinner and Pete asked why they had so many kids.

BN: They must want a big family.

Pete: Why don't you and Mom want a lot of kids.

Me: Well, we just wanted a small family. Our arms are full with the love from you and RePete. And besides after we had you two, I said enough is enough, there's no way in hell I'd have another punk.

Pete: (clever boy) How do you stop from having babies?

Me: (Quietly out of corner of mouth to BN) Your turn?

BN: You just decide not to have anymore. (sweat breaking out on forehead)

Pete: But HOW do you stop?

Me: (under my breath) Not yet, I can't do this yet. Your turn again.

BN: Well I got fixed. (Boink - me clocking him over the head in my mind)

Pete: Fixed?

BN: (always gives too much info) Well, there's this tube in your testicle that the doctor can cut to prevent you from having babies.

Me: (stuffing my mouth with food so I won't have to talk)

Pete: But shouldn't Mom have that, she has the babies.

Me: (unable to breathe, choking on food) Make it go away. He's too young for this. Besides, I don't have testes.

BN: Let's just say we decided to stop having babies and that's it for now. We'll talk more about it when you are older. (good boy!)

Pete: (looking bored now) Okay. Dad, can you play a video game with us now?

Me: Phew!

~R

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